I figure I need to really continue blogging. Journaling is something that is so important for me. I seem to forget little details, or things that I think don't mean anything. When I read old journals, from say, year 1998, I'm full of nostalgia. I can recall the very emotions I felt then. A majority of the time I laugh at myself, seeing how silly I was then. When it comes to all the "hard times" I read about, I think, "wow, I never thought I'd survive after that." It's amazing. I can watch myself grow up, just from my journals.
For the past two years I really have slacked when it came to journaling. I'm almost scared I'm going to lose those memories. They already seem foggy. I remember the really sad and negative things that have happened. That's no good.
Anyhow... I'll blog again later today. I think another reason for journaling is because I feel most comfortable spilling out my feelings and thoughts on paper, or... rather e-paper, as opposed to burdening my friends with my mindless ramblings. I guess I feel no one cares enough to want to listen. If that's not the case, I just don't trust them.
This sounds so negative. Before I leave for the gym, I'll note something positive, so years from now when I read this I will be able to remember something that made me feel nice. A few days when I got out of the shower after a workout, this lady in her late 40s asked me how long I work out a day, I told her 1 1/2-2hours. And she explained to me how she was trying to convince her daughter that she needed to work out 2-3hours a day to lose some weight before going off to college. I told her I wish I could work out 3 hours a day, but my schedule doesn't allow me to. I actually thought she was hinting to me that I was fat, but then she told me that she wished her daughter looked like me. In ways it made me feel genuinely good about myself. Though, in Monica nature, I kept pondering what she said to me, and started to feel sad for her daughter, eventually I started to think that she was probably lying to me. Haha. Shit. I said I was going to end this positively. SO!! Here we go, a woman in the gym paid me a really nice compliment.
Off to the gym!
xx
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